In my DINK (Dual Income No Kids) life, in addition to making new friends, every time a friend had a baby, I also frequently wondered what stay at home moms could possibly do all day. I figured the bon-bons & TV on the couch must be true. 4 kids later I know that's not true. I recently had a friend (who is going back to staying at home after being out working) ask me what things make my life easier. That made me think about what things help me make the most of out of the day instead of hoping to make through it most of the day.
here are a few things that came to mind- including a piece of chocolate which I ate as I sat down to write this:
-decide what things you want to get done- like what you want to teach your kids plus the obvious things like taking care of the house/ feeding, dressing, bathing
-think about what things your kids can do by themselves (like take a nap, blanket time, and our new family favorite- watch a 30 minute movie after naps)
-think about what things you can do with the kids (either while they're doing something else or things they can help you with) I recently saw
this post on ways young children can help around the house which has some good ideas. I do most of my cooking & regular kitchen clean up while the boys are playing after meals or coloring, doing puzzles at the table.
-decide you want to do without the kids help (like personal devotion time, weeding through the growing pile of artwork & toys)
-develop a routine/ schedule which matches those up & fits your family. Don't be a slave to your schedule to let it help you. I really think routine helps most people esp. kids. Know that your schedule will change over time especially with young kids
our day generally looks like this
7 am kids up (I plan to get up at 6:30 to shower/ read my Bible before they're up but I haven't been great at that)
7:30 eat breakfast/ read Bible together
8:00 chores/ get dressed/ clean rooms
8:30 kids play/ I finish cleaning kitchen
9:00-11:30- our time for outings (parks, libraries, Fun Fridays, stores, ...),
blanket time (I never read this post before right now but it explains a way of doing blanket time & a few other good suggestions- I think I'll have to remember sound off TV once I have more readers), puzzles, crafts, bath time, outside, book reading...
11:30 lunch
12:00 play/ cleanup
13:00 nap (my quiet time if I didn't do it early. much better when it's my time to listen to a podcast and get stuff done)
15:00 Math/ snack- I'm trying to bribe my kids to like math :) there are just so many great things to count & add- like pretzels, grapes, ... some days we
15:30 The prize- 30 min movie for boys who did their chores & a good job at naptime (my time for doing something with quiet/ still kids)
16:00 play outside with good weather, walks lots of days
17:30 get ready for dinner/ boys play. I almost never cook dinner late afternoon- too many tired people. I usually pull it out of the freezer or make it in the morning and stick in the oven in the afternoon. A huge help has been planning out meals way in advance with a
meal plan1800 dinner
1830 ready for bed, playtime or family time (game night, movie night, family devotions)
1900 bedtime books, prayers, bed
of course, that is the plan. sometimes someone doesn't nap or doesn't get a prize or naps at the "wrong" time, and it doesn't work out. but this is the plan
what else helps?
-a wonderful woman recommended getting out of the house at least once a day- a lot of days that means getting out in the back yard or for a walk around the neighborhood. some days it's a trip somewhere- walmart, a friend's, a park. good for everyone!
-most of the time "less is more." I started out the year with the good idea fairy adding tons of school plans- now we usually do Bible, math, & reading and anything else is bonus. the same goes with stuff (shoes, books, toys, clutter)- the more you have, the more you have to clean, dry, put away, ... decide what you & your husband are comfortable with for tidiness. I don't like having many dirty clothes so we do a load (or 2) a day but the clothes may not get put away every day. That's okay with me but might borrow some. here are more
tips.
-There are tons of great curriculum out there. I have looked at some but I've tried not to look at too many because I really like what I've read and heard about
Ambleside Online and I'd rather spend my time & energy doing that than deciding. Right now we're doing grapes, pretzels, lego math but I'm leaning towards
Math-U-See. We have been borrowing Decimal Street with our building supplies. We've also opened several toy stores to practice buying & selling. K & C like to draw lots & do deductive reasoning puzzles. We have some preschool workbooks- Spiderman made math very fun for a week or so. We're going to start
handwriting.
-don't waste time and energy comparing yourself to others. Just because I see someone who has as many responsibilities as I am but still is able to make
beautiful things like these and many more, doesn't mean I'm not doing or being enough. :) I can only be and do the things God calls me to- I should not try to do more or less.
-"academics" doesn't take very long when they're little & you only have a child or two to teach. Don't feel like you have to spend all day doing it- you're not in a race to see whose child knows what first. Teach them more than facts. Teach them to learn. Look for teachable moments. the boys were so excited today to read the Operation Christmas Child Special Report and see one of our boxes in Africa. K recognized the wrapping paper and tried to figure out which boy or girl is getting that box- that made it real to him.
I learn something new every day. I have learned that bon bons and TV on the couch isn't true but a little chocolate helps :) (not as much as trusting God though!)
oh and turning off the computer during the day helps too!
